Through All My Struggles, You Will Be There
by cocoluv
Summary: Nessie's been through heart break and she's been through finding out the past. Now that she and Jake are a couple, what does that mean? Are their differences going to tear them apart? Let's hope not. LEMONS later, T for now.
1. What Hurts The Most

**Hey Guys! So, I've finally decided to give you something of mine—a bit of a Jake and Nessie Fanfic. I have about 5 chapters written but, I have other FanFics that I'll be posting that have about 10-13 chapters each. **

**Sorry, this chapter will be short, but they will start get longer and more interesting! Okay, now here's what I'd like to address. About every 2 weeks, I'll post 3-4 chapters on here and answer your questions! Please, ask away! I'm trying to write it closer to the books and keep the characters as original as possible. Of course, I'm probably going to tweek something here and there to blend it in with the plot! **

**Also, (sorry, I know you want me to shut up) these first like, 3 chapters will be intense and dark. Renesmee Carlie Cullen is a very dynamic girl. LEMONS in later chapters and extreme Jacob hotness. **

**One last note, if you go to YouTube and look up my channel: glamgirls6798, there'll be a playlist for this FanFic AND I've included Renesmee's dress for a later chapter! My name is maddiecreates. **

****Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight and all Twilight characters associated with the novel. **

**Without further ado, I give you: Chapter 1!**

1: What Hurts the Most

Renesmee POV:

Aunt Rosalie and Aunt Alice were holding me hostage, trying to get me ready for another date with my as-of-today, boyfriend…. Duh-duh-da-nah… Tyler. Tyler had met me at the park when I'd first came to Twimon Eclawn City, a city populated by only 800 people. No wonder their mall was tiny. The whole Vamp/Wolf clan of us had moved here, leaving behind two sad people: Billy and Grandpa Charlie.

It rained everyday here, the gloom always above, reflecting my mood most of the time. Right now, I could hear the thunder and then the door opening and I smelled Jacob's scent and the fresh rain.

"Where's Ness?" I heard him ask Mom.

"Upstairs, Rose and Alice are holding her hostage, trying to get her ready for her date with Tyler."

"Still dating that fool?" Jake's voice said. I wanted Mom to say no, for some reason. I liked Tyler he was reasonable, smart, funny. But, he didn't know me like Jake did. Jake, Jake, Jake… like water dripping from a faucet; like the ticking of a clock, tick, tick, tick, Jake, Jake, Jake….

"Not really 'dating' as you say," I heard Mom's lips pull apart into a smile. And then I heard fabric moving around, and it getting louder, Jacob's scent becoming fresher.

"Ugh, the _stench_!" Aunt Rose murmured. I smiled at her, trying to wipe the sweat on my jeans. 6:53, that's the time on the clock. Apparently, according to Alice Tyler'll be here in exactly eight minutes, one minute late.

The door flew open, and in came Jake. "So, you're going on a… date." I shook my head.

"I don't think I'd call it that," I tapped my finger on my chin and Alice took that as her cue to leave. So did Aunt Rosalie. They shut the door, making blush at their thumbs up, and 'go get him, girl'. _Why__is__everyone__so__embarrassing?_

"I don't know, honey." My dad called from downstairs. "That's a question I've been asking for along time, ever since your Mom came over for the first time." _Thanks,__I__meant__you__too._ "Oh." He said.

"So, a new school, a new boyfriend, new house, new friends—"

"Maybe I should just become a new Renesmee!" I snapped, and he laughed.

"New is… good." He said after a very quiet minute.

"I like the old, too." I laid my hand on his, showing him all the good times we had back in Forks.

"I _miss_the old, back before you had a _boyfriend_."

"It's just a 'friends with benefits' relationship." Yeah, that's a good way to put it, right? I mean, Tyler and I have kissed but he's nothing even close to compared about what I feel for-

"Nessie!" Dad shouted. _You__don__'__t__have__to__listen,__you__know._

"What kind of benefits, exactly?" Jake asked me.

"We've kissed and hugged, but I don't feel in love with him. I feel that way about someone else," I admitted.

"Like who?—"

Jake's sentence was interrupted by a car honk, it was Tyler's. I looked at my clock. 7:01. "Gotta run, sorry Jake."

And I left him wondering who it was that I had feelings for. If only he knew.

"Yep, if only he knew." Dad repeated.

But I was in the car by then, to far to whack him on the head.

"So, what are we doing here?" I asked as he pulled into Kissing Rock. The ocean was choppy below, the wind making it splash up onto the rocks.

"The view's nice here, and it is called 'Kissing Rock'." He gave me a lopsided grin, and I returned it. "Hey, are you still going to go to that preppy school?" Tyler asked his voice serious again.

"All of my family is going there, why wouldn't I?" Twimon Eclawn Prep, where my family was enrolled.

The wolves, Leah, Seth, Quil, Embry, Jacob, would be going, along with the vamps, Aunt Rose, Uncle Em, Aunt Alice, Uncle Jasper, Mom, Dad and Carlisle was going to teach advanced biology. Then, I, Nessie, fit in somewhere in the middle. _Somewhere,__right?_ Dad would've said right.

"Hey," Ty slid his hand on my knee. "You alright, you've been kind of quiet tonight." It wasn't a question. I shouldn't be thinking about where I fit in between mythological creatures. I shouldn't be thinking about whom I like more, Ty or Jake. I leaned over and kissed him, passion building between us—er, him. And I just kissed him, I kissed him like I liked it, like I wasn't pretending it was Jake next to me. _Jake._

What was I doing? I was going to break my own heart and Ty's. I slumped down against the seat, panting and trying to control my thoughts. Why are you acting like this? Jake isn't into you. I realized, a second later, my shirt was unbuttoned.

"Hey, why'd you stop? I liked where we were going." Tyler said, smiling. Why was he being so childish?

"Ugh, you are _so_immature." I groaned.

"And you're freaking bipolar." He said, turning sour on me.

"Why, because I don't want to 'put out' for you?" I crossed my arms over my chest; tonight Tyler was bugging me to no end.

"Why am I even going out with you?" I heard him say. I felt hot, burning, crocodile tears well up in my eyes.

"Just take me back to my house, okay?" He unlocked the doors.

"Nope, get out." I didn't, I stayed frozen where I was, and then he gave me a little shove and out I went. "You are such a little girl, Ness. You aren't good enough, and you never will be for me or anyone else!" He could've just slapped me, in fact I really rather he did. Those words killed me.

He threw my purse at me and laughed in my face while the rain poured down on me. "Yeah, insult Tyler Benson some more!" And then the door closed, and I watched the car drive off until I couldn't anymore.

The waves looked scary from where I was standing, they looked like knives cut into the water. "I can't do this." Yes you can. I am worthless, nothing, a little girl, not good enough for anyone.

I took the 'No Parking' sign pole by my hand and threw my purse over it. Goodbye world, goodbye Dad, Mom, Jake… the boy I love more than I should, the one I am breaking my heart for.

What hurt the most was that none of the guys I'd chastened after—changed my whole look for didn't want me. No one ever mentioned when I went out with them that I was better than good enough. I clenched my fists, staring at my reflection in the water. With my good eye-sight I could see that for the first time in weeks—I was showing how I felt. I rubbed my makeup off of my face. _I__like__this__Renesmee__better._

Then, I slipped off the black stilettos and felt my bare feet touch the cold, wet rocks. I took a deep breath, and closed my eyes. Goodbye…. I jumped. I felt my butt hit the water first and then my torso and legs. It felt like a million knives in my flesh, digging their points into me. The salty water was so… different. It was in my throat, choking me, and making me lose consciousness. And then, one huge wave rolled on top of me, making me collide with a rock. My world went dark.

Edward's POV:

Nessie was an hour late, two hours and three. Finally, I sat up and called Tyler's number.

"Hello?"

"Tyler, this is Edward, Renesmee's da—brother," I'm supposed to be her brother. Not old enough to be a father of a 16 year old, oh but I am. "Have you seen her? She hasn't come back, is she with you?"

I met Bella's eyes, and Jacob's. The most precious, perfect person in the world had to be okay.

Tyler laughed. "No, she's not with me. We broke up," I could hear the hidden secret behind those words. "I left her at Kissing Rock, the little brat—"

"Hey! Do not call my dau—sister a brat! What did you do?"

"All I wanted was to have some fun," _Great.__He__wanted__to__have__sex__with__her_. I nodded at Jake's thought. "She's probably still there, unless she jumped!" He laughed and hung up the phone, his words were ringing in my ears.

In a second, Alice, Jasper, Emmett, Rose, Esme and Carlisle were by my side, urging me to let them help find her. I nodded, and we were at the door, Jacob phased and Bella held my hand. _She__'__s__going__to__be__fine._

_I hope I get to rip Tyler's throat out._

_Please, don't let her die!_

_Her clothes are new!_

_My granddaughter will be okay._

_We'll need to resuscitate her if she jumped—and check her vitals._

And then we reached Kissing Rock and found what I hoped we wouldn't. Nessie's stuff, but no Nessie.

All nine of us were thinking the same thing. _Oh,__God.__She__jumped!_

And Tyler's words were ringing louder and louder in my ear. "Nessie!"

And then a faint, broken sob.


	2. When I Jump, I Fall

**Hey, guys! Time for another chapter! IDK what's up with the italicized font on Chapter 1; because it didn't do that when I looked at it on Word. Sorry! I'm trying to fix all of my story's problems, just bare with me! Thanks! Lots of Jacob comforting Ness and them—kinda—confessing their feelings for each other! **

****Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight and all characters associated with Twilight. I own a really embarrassed Nessie and a cute Jake. **

Chapter 2: When I Jump, I Fall… Yeah, I Know That Now

Renesmee's POV:

I heard someone call my name, so I must not have died. I wonder who it is. I was lying on the beach, my throat burning and my clothes soaked. I was shivering; I'd never been this cold. My heart felt like it was going to explode, it was so fast.

I gasped at the pain in my arm, a long, shallow cut forming across the top, wrapping around it, and into my wrist. And then I felt the heart wrenching tears form, and I sobbed, and sobbed.

Worthless, little girl, good for nothing, Nessie all alone, "You aren't any of those things!" My father shouted. My father? I stood up, ignoring the pain.

"Daddy?" I whimpered. "Help me." In a second I thought I saw something white at the top of the cliff, but I stumbled and tripped on a rock. Everything went black again.

Edward's POV:

I heard my baby call my name, and then I heard her ask for help. She was hurt, and she thought she was nothing. When she was safe, Jacob would tell her. Then, she wouldn't feel so bad about herself anymore.

"She's down there," I could see her little body on the beach, her clothes flung to her body.

I told Jake to stay on the beach, and then all of us dived in, going to her. We got to her ten point eight seconds later, her breathing hard and forced.

I tried to read her mind, but the connection was weak. _Please__let__me__go__peacefully,__tell__my__Dad__I__love__him.__Tell__my__Mom__I__love__her;__tell__Jake__that__I__felt__more__for__him__than__friendly__feelings._Her mind was whispering, her thoughts slipping away.

"No!" I growled. "Fight, Nessie!" I put my hand on hers. "It's Daddy. Fight, fight, fight!" And she did, slipping into a dreamlike state, her breathing becoming relaxed and her mind easing up, getting louder.

Carlisle lifted her onto the stretcher, putting it in Emmett and Jasper's hands. He then clipped her in, making it tight, so she wouldn't fall. They carried my daughter up, into the car and waited for Bella and me to crawl up.

I held Bella's hand and didn't let go for a very long time.

Renesmee's POV:

I woke up, feeling much better, and being much too comfortable. I wanted to see what was so warm next to me.

"Oh," I rolled over, becoming face to face with Jake. "Hey." I hope he didn't think I was crazy.

"'Course not," He smiled and held up my hand that was lying on his cheek. "Never."

"Then you know what happened, huh?" I asked.

"I only knew that you jumped a cliff, because of some freak." That's putting it nicely, I thought.

"My thoughts are yours," Daddy, please feel free to explain what happened to the others.

"Ready?" Jake said, I nodded.

Jake's POV:

Now I was sitting in that crap-face's car. Ness and him were making out, ew, and then suddenly, she jerked away, a look of guilt on her face. He didn't want her to stop, so she called him immature. He shoved her out of the car, and I watched as her face grew into a look of anger and pain. I heard her say: "Goodbye world, mom, dad, Jake… the boy I love more than I should, the one I am breaking my heart over."

Was that really how she felt? I felt that way, too. Edward wanted me to tell her, and I knew I should.

I saw her jump, and felt her pain. The heart-breaking sadness in her as she realized she never kissed me. Oh, God, I screwed up.

The vision snapped off and it was her face in front of mine, her chocolate eyes not meeting mine. "Sorry," She mumbled, a tear falling down her cheek.

"For…?"

"Everything, I shouldn't have told you. Let's not act until after my birthday, okay? Then, we can talk about it." She sat up, and kissed my forehead, big fat tears rolling down her cheeks.

"Yes." No. I wanted to pull her back, kiss her on the lips, and tell her I love her. But, I didn't, I did what she wanted, even if it was hurting us.

She looked at me and smiled, the connection still flowing. She had just heard all of that; my palm had been the key. "So…?" I said.

"We still wait," She said through her unmoving lips. Those beautiful, gracious lips…. She released her hand from mine.

"Why?"

"You're the greatest gift—and I want you for my birthday, as my present." She smiled and then backed out of the room, bouncing side to side.

Renesmee POV:

Claire was sitting in front of me, reviewing what I'd told Jake. Claire was the same age as me—at least physically. I'm turning fourteen this year, but I look about eighteen. Claire just had her eighteenth birthday, August 18th, and now it was the day before my birthday. September 5th.

"You're an idiot, but I respect your discion." I smiled at her, and looked at myself in the mirror. Pretty. We were deciding what to wear. "I mean really, if you think about it, you shouldn't wait—you're his—" She clasped her hand around her mouth.

"What?"

"Oh, um, perfect girlfriend,"

"Yeah, but if he doesn't think of me like that—"

"He won't."

"The guy practically raised me, Claire." The realization sunk in. "He saw me in diapers!" I shouted, and then gasped. "He changed them, too." He was there when I asked Mom for a bra, there when I got my period. There when Emmett found my tampons and didn't know what they were. Gosh! He'd asked me what they were, and why they were in my drawer—IN FRONT OF JACOB! I took a shaky breath, and then felt the tears come.

He saw every little bit of me. I was so embarrassed, and I felt like I was naked in front of a thousand people. I bolted out the door, and towards my escape.

Jake's POV:

I heard Edward walk into the wolf house, and I heard Leah make a comment about how she was going to have to Frebreeze the whole house again. "Yeah?" I said when he called my name.

"Nessie's embarrassed, she, and I quote 'feels like she's naked in front of a thousand people'." He gazed at me. "She knows you changed her diaper, and the whole tampon thing." I busted out laughing.

"She's run off," my laughter abruptly stopped.

"Where?"

"Her 'escape'," he didn't meet my eyes.

"And that's…"

"A secret she won't tell anyone."

"I think I know where it might be," the idea hit me.

Renesmee's POV:

I relaxed as the tree-house Jake and I built when I was little came into view. It was the coolest thing ever, it was the size of a house, had working plumbing and electricity and a kitchen and two rooms.

In the foyer, there was a baby-grand piano, I ran for it. Put my fingers on the keys and began to play my favorite song.

"Nessie! Is that you?" Jake's voice calls, and the door downstairs opens. He runs up the stairs and I turn and look at him, and his face softens, the tears probably apparent.

"Oh, Jake." I say, he brings me into his arms and lays me onto the couch, across his body.

"Shh, shh, it's alright." He rubs small circles into my back and whispers sweet nothings into my ear. We stay like that for hours, the pain of embarrassment gone.

For now.


	3. The Truth at 8 in the Morn'

**Alrighty! Chapter 3! Jake and Nessie finally get their moment! Enjoy ;) **

****Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight and all characters associated with Twilight. I own the love struck Nessie and a very, very _excited_ Jake.**

Chapter 3: The Truth at 8 in the Morn'

"Jake?" I must've fallen asleep. He's snoring lightly on the couch, the angelic, sunny Jake mask on. I press my palm to his and in swirls his dreams.

He and I are kissing on the couch, both caught up in the moment. I pull my palm away, knowing too well that's what I want, but I remember my tantrum and the embarrassment's back.

I show him a picture of me, waking him up. It works, his eyes open and he smiles. "I told you, wait for my birthday." He nods.

"I'm sorry, I'm going to have to buy you a new shirt… or at least give you one of Seth's or something."

"You're going to steal it?" He arches an eyebrow at me.

"I steal your clothes all the time, Jake." I say, and then bite my lip.

"Yeah? I bet you look a thousand times better than me in them," I blush and murmur 'impossible'.

"Alright, fine. You win, but I need to talk to you." He nods business like.

"Yes,"

"I'm em-em-embarassed!" I whimper.

"Why?"

"You raised me, Jake. I mean you all did, Quil, Embry, Seth, Mom, Dad, Jasper, Emmett, Alice, Rosalie—but I don't have feelings for any of them,"

"I think it's high time I tell you."

"Tell me—tell me what?"

"I imprinted." WHAT? Oh my God. NO! This WAS NOT happening. He did not just say he imprinted on another girl. Somehow, I managed to keep my voice calm.

"Can I meet her?" He laughed.

"You're funny, Ness."

"Is that a no?"

"You already know her, honey." So it was Leah? Or Claire—that wasn't possible, you can't imprint on another imprintee.

"Oh—Oh." I stood up, and then fell to the floor, my legs shaking so angrily I couldn't stand. "So, is it Leah?"

"Nope." He smiled.

"Claire?"

"No, no."

"Okay, is it someone else I know? Like that chick who works with you?" Latonia, ew.

"No, you know her real well." I gasped.

"MOM? Is it Mom?"

"No, no, no." He said quickly, avoiding my eyes.

Then a small whimper came out of my lips, and I didn't know if it was going to cause pain or happiness.

"Is-is it me?" I whispered whilst he smiled.

"Bingo," He stood up, taking my hands in his.

"How long?"

"Since you were a baby," He admitted. "I love you, Ness. As more than a friend or a sister or best friend."

"I love you too, Jake." And I looked at him. "Wait, I said until my birthday."

"Happy birthday," The clock was blinking 8:05 AM. And then his lips met mine, and the rain falling could've been sparks, heck, there could be World War 3 for all I cared. Jacob was kissing me, on the lips. His hands were on my hips, holding me to him while our lips moved in synchronization. I shivered at the pleasure from it, and he pulled back, my arms still woven around his neck. "Wow," He breathed.

Wow was most definitely right.

I walked back to the wolf house with Jacob's arm around my waist. Paul was sitting with Rachel, smiling at the two of us. Rachel bounced up, ever so slightly nudging me out of the way as the other wolves came downstairs to greet the new arrival wolves. I could see Emily and Sam getting out of the car, along with Jared and Kim.

They all looked like a family, and I stared at my pale skin, noticing I didn't fit in. Not here, or there. I gave Emily a small smile and walked out the door. Jacob was still saying hi to the wolves and their girlfriends coming in; I didn't fit in. That little nudge from Rachel told me everything.

I never would.

I went to the vampire house, Mom and Dad both sat up, putting their hands on my shoulders, embracing me. "Sorry, baby." Mom smiled and stepped away, motioning for me to look.

"Look who's here."

It was Nathaniel; they only other half-vampire I'd ever met, well, other than Nahuel. "Nathan!" I swung my arms around his neck and hugged him, not having seen him since I was three.

"Wow, Ness. Don't get the wrong idea but you're… beautiful." I blushed, looking at my shoes.

"Thanks, but I have a—" I remembered the scene at the wolf house. "Thanks." My dad looked at me sorrowfully, and patted my back.

"Nathan? Why don't you and Nessie take a walk?" Nathaniel grinned.

"So, how's life?" He asked.

"Boring and hard, being in a divided house is hard as always."

"Harder when you're not in either category, huh?" He picked up on my hurt tone.

"How'd you know?"

"We're one—okay, thirteen of a kind." He smiled. "I know how it feels."

I rubbed his arm. "It's not so bad with you around," He smiled and I smiled back and he hugged me.

"Happy birthday,"

"Thanks,"

"You're fifteen now?"

"Fifteen, that's me, there's a party tonight, you know Alice."

"Not very well, but yeah, I know Alice."

I laughed at his weary tone, he certainly did understand me.

I was feeling much better when I walked into vampire house, until I saw Jacob. Then, I felt it again.

"C'mon, honey. We've got to get you ready for your party." Alice grabbed my arm and pulled me into her gigantic house-sized closet.

The. Torture. Began.


End file.
